a gift from me to you. Thanks Dad.

There are about 50 other things that I SHOULD be doing right now, but I can't help to stop and ponder on God's faithfulness in my life - and share the story with you! I actually just finished rushing around trying to figure things out in my own strength, and I sat down in this couch with a pillow sitting next to me that reads: "Worry ends where faith in Jesus begins". That is SO true.. and a good reminder for me right now.

Here's the story: I have been praying literally every day for nearly 5 months for the opportunity to visit my sister in Uganda. It started with a class on prayer, and how God wants us to be persistent in our prayer. While studying this, God really gave me the impression to make a list of the things/people on my heart and to begin praying with expectancy for these things. and with persistence. The next day, I was healed from lactose intolerance... one of the things on my list. I kept praying for these things, some more diligently than others. The lesson I was learning was that it is a 'yes' until it's a 'no' from God. No answer is not necessarily a NO. He wants us to keep coming to him in prayer. He wants to refine our hearts through prayer. He also wants to test our faith in what we are willing to pursue. Anyway, long story short, after much faith wavering and prayer, God answered my prayers by providing me the money I needed to purchase the place ticket to Uganda - through a friend and my forgotten tax return! What a Valentine's Day gift! It took me a couple days to reach Jess and tell her, and I still haven't been able to actually book the ticket. It's a little stressful having this all so last minute! There is much to do... including getting a yellow fever shot. book the tickets. call jess and finalize details. PLUS make sure Im caught up for homework and work that I will be missing next week. It's a busy week to be missing too!! But, God gave me the answer yes before I had any idea HOW it would work. He is faithful, and will work out the details of this trip! and my schoolwork!

My dear friend and roommate wrote me a letter when she found out, and it turned out to be a great encouragement to me! It explains very eloquently what I was feeling on Monday so I wanted to share it as well:

My dear Jenn,
I hope you realize, my dear sister, that Jesus has just given you an enormous valentine! Not only in the form of the trip to Uganda itself has this come, but in such a grand increase of faith! He has given this to me too!! What a joy this is to be so close to such a story - and to have been used by God to bring it about through prayer.
This is huge Jen. This is God Himself sitting next to you in class and joining you in the hallway to cry. This is Him standing with us in front of the bathrooms and the echo room laughing with us as we hugged and jumped up and down. It's HIm sighing with love and asking with a smirk: "Why did you doubt?" (for at least I did, a little). This is God proving to us, yet again, that we have no reason to live as if we think He is not trustworthy, or omnipotent, or that He doesn't love to give good gifts to His children. This is indeed a Happy Valentine's Day. I applaud God's impeccable timing. How more sweetly significant this is than it would have been on any old day, like February 3rd. I think this date was the cherry on top. Man, He must love us Jen!
Remember what I wrote about Nathanael in John 1, and my dad and the swing? "You will see greater things than these" - I believe this was one of them - and that it's only the beginning. I don't want anything to hold me back from greater faith and explicit trust in God for everything from finding shoes for work, to plane tickets overseas - and beyond! your faith and vision has brought about this straw (which I hope will be the last) necessary to break my accursed scepticism. He has won me over again.
But God Himself has done this, by working in secret until the opportune time, anticipating your reaction of astonishment and wonder. Meanwhile, He's kept me riveted to the hope of this result by the assurance: "And then you will know that I am the Lord." I trust I will not be the only one convinced of this by the testimony of this story. However you tell it in the future this must be resoundingly clear: The zeal of the Lord Almighty has accomplished this.
I'm so glad I can share this joy with you.
Love, Alyssa

Old Games. New Stories.

I don't know if I am allowed to be this happy for my sister. It's a strange form of jealousy because I don't wish that it WAS me, I just wish I could be experiencing what she is along side her. I want to see it. Spring break is only weeks away, but I'm still praying that doors could open for me to go. A week with her there would hardly even do it justice. I am so proud of my little sis. I think its awesome that she is living it out. What a better way to dream than to live in it?

[UPDATE on Uganda: last night I went with a couple friends and a teacher to her friends house for dinner. It was a fun night filled with good conversation in a home with a family. Loved it. Nita asked us what we were planning for spring break, and so I described to them my prayer for visiting Jess in Uganda. I got to explain what she is doing there and the things God is revealing to her. Later in conversation, the topic turned to my time in India, and I explained to them what God showed ME in India when I was there my first time. I did not even realize what I was saying, but after put it together. It's so similar to being the same dream... just in a different context. I felt like that was the green light I had been waiting for for months from God. I recognized His voice. It was the same voice that confirmed my decision about YWAM years ago. The same voice that told me to choose India over Rwanda during my DTS. The same voice that said I could go back to India last year. I still don't know HOW it will happen, but I feel like yesterday I got the go-ahead when previously all I was hearing was wait. It's kind of exciting! If anyone has any airmiles/aeroplan points that they would be willing to give up for this please let me know! I would happily use your hard earned points!]

On another note, I had something called 'Ministry Week'... which was really two and a half days...earlier this week. I was with a group of girls who went to the Healing House. It's a safe house for women dealing with abuse or addiction or similar experiences. I met some incredible women over these past few days... and kids too! I don't even know which part was my favorite! We have to write a brief paper about a highlight and I think choosing my topic will be the most difficult part.

We arrived Monday afternoon knowing that we already had too many of us for the work that they would have for us to do... and knowing that we would have to be fairly flexible. Kenzie and I were given the role of student leaders, which really meant organizing people into groups when necessary and being on top of the schedule. Our first day was spent in the kitchen preparing food and cleaning and organizing. After dinner I got caught talking with a girl from Texas, and ended up hearing her life story with a couple others in her room with pictures and all. It was cool to be trusted so quickly. The next day was spent with cleaning and childcare mostly. After lunch a few of us played a game with some of the ladies. We got caught talking again, and this time heard another incredible story from one of the residents. It was so inspiring to have these women open up to us and tell us their stories. We heard stories of self-mutilation. of abuse. of of rape. of drugs and alcohol. and of love. We spent the night and woke for another day feeling more and more at home. These ladies welcomed us into their lives. They told us after that it felt like a vacation while we were there. We were able to bring with us a fresh breath of air and a spirit of newness. We were just happy they felt as blessed as we did! Our final day didn't hold very much 'work' to do at all, but there was crafts to prep and rooms to clean. In the evening we put on a service for the ladies, and did childcare for the kids. I got the oldest kids and had so much fun making up games and competitions to entertain them. I walked away with my first silly-band ever, as well as two drawings and a hug from the most unlikely of all the kids. It was hard to leave. BUT some of the ladies talked us in to coming back this coming weekend for a girls night complete with nail polish and pizza! I look forward to that on Saturday...

Today was back to Global Harvest Church for the first time since before break. Back to igloo building too! and back to class tomorrow.