Even on the Darkest of Nights..

Incerdible Story:

Okay so the background of my day yesterday... I had joined Steph once again with her Irish friends here as they took us around the country. We first went to see Dunluce Castle - beautiful! Pictures to come soon. Then off to Giants Causeway which was again, amazing. It was a day of bitter cold and breathtaking scenery. Our final stop before dinner was a place called the Mussenden Temple which was kind of weird to be honest. You walk through this strange garden and the 'Bishop's Gate'.. through a giant pasture... to this old house/mansion/castle called the 'Downhill House'. Just this giant old remains of a building in the middle of well-maintained grass seemingly on the top of the world. Then just past the castle house there is this circular bulding perched on the very edge of the cliffs. The top of Northern Ireland it felt like. This was the temple... the weird part is that there really are no signs explaining it, and no one around that seems to be maintaining or supervising the place. it is just open. So we walked around.. Took pictures and tried to pet the sheep wandering about. When we made it back to the car it was just about dark when Ester went to unlock the car only to discover that her keys were missing! Somewhere among the fields, the castle, the temple, and the garden were her keys! And all we had was a cellphone for light. We looked for roughly an hour, trying to retrace our steps, adn praying ferverishly. Finally we had all gathered again and decided we would have to walk into the nearest town and wait for someone to drive the hour and a half from Belfast to come get us. At this point of giving up, Steph kicked the ground and walked on. Stevie was the one to ask what that noise was.. Steph;s response was 'nothing.. I just kicked something'. Stevie shone the light and Lo and Behold THE KEYS! An hour of searching all the grounds (in the FREEZING weather I might add) only to have the keys lying in the very spot we had stopped and given up. This seemingly little story was a HUGE reminder to all of us that God is at work, and looking after his children. Even in the Darkness He shows up, and will use anything He wants to reveal Himself to us. Just like the star that led the wisemen to the baby Jesus those many years ago.

Yesterday was a very good day to end this year with. Today however I am feeling quite sick and am spending the day curled up on the couch with another book - my third for the break. I love to read! Also as hesitantly as I would admit it... I would say that today I am feeling homesick finally. The difference in my head is that on regular days I will miss people and miss family and miss home, but when Im homesick I dont miss anything I just want to BE home and BE with certain people. So today I dont miss you, I want to be with you. To be sliding down the same hill in the same toboggans as we have done for years beyond my birth even. To be sitting on my bed carrassed in your warmth while we giggle about contants of our box. To be lying on your floor talking occasionally but mostly just enjoying. To be eating your cooking. To be watching you paint. To be playing old video games. To be talking without explaining, using more motions and eye signals than words. AH to be young again. I dont know where that one came from. It reminded me of an old song or something. Last night the heating was accidentally left on all night and with my bed right beside the only radiator in our room well I think it has made me delirious today. I thought I was feverish all night because we are NEVER hot here. I had a restless night and woke up many times confused and aggitated as I couldnt figure out why I was so warm! I think I need to stop reading my books and go socialize or something...

ANYWAY.. so Tonight the plan for New Years is to go out to eat at a nice restaurant and then go to Steph's friend's house for games and merriment afterwards. It sounds divine, but I dont think I will be going anywhere for tonight at least. I need to be feeling top notch for this weekend as I am being whisked away by an old friend from Kentucky who is coming to visit some of his friends here in Northern Ireland (what a small world!). They are kidnapping me for the weekend and I am excited to see what they have planned! So a very Happy Christmas to you all and Have a great night tonight as we all celebrate the New Year!

the latest life change:

Hello Family and Friends! I am so excited to be writing this week's blog because I feel that so far it has been the most important week in lectures and growth in general. I am so blessed to be here!

Soo, this past week the lectures were on our Identity in Christ and we had a husband/wife team come and share with us. The first half of the week we learned about our Original Design - so learning who it is that GOD created us as individuals to be and to rebuke any lies about ourselves that either we have told ourselves or that others have spoken to us. We had a time of prayer and other times of affirmations and encouraging one another. It was so neat to see how God had so clearly given each of us parts of HIS character to enbody. And to see how because of our different designs we can work so much better together when we are walking in the design we are intended for. THEN the second chunk of the week was leanring about 'Strongholds' or areas of sin in our life preventing us from fully living in our orignal design. Again we had a prayer time, and a couple different teachings on different strongholds and how to repent and accept forgiveness. An example of this is the stronghold of PASSIVITY where the stronghold is the trunk of a tree and the leaves (or ways that sin is displayed in your life) would be not asking for prayer when needed or waiting for people to come talk to you at an event instead of initiating and the roots of this could be injustices - so things that happened in your past that you had no control over and did not deserve or generational or inherited sin (like when this is looked at as just a way of life or 'who I am').... So we individually had a time of prayer about a major stronghold in our lives and then how to take practical steps with God to defeat this. I wont share so impersonally over the computer about this area of my life, but I do believe that one of the greatest tools we have to use is accountability and you need to be vulnerable in order to do that. We also learned this week about Blessings and Cursings that come from our mouths and how when we speak out against someone or group of people we are in a way cursing them (which really does nothing for you, and can only harm that person). So we talked about blessing people, especially those who have cursed you. One really important thing that Ive learned this week is the impact the spoken word has, whether that is in repenting verbally or rebuking evil, or affirming someone... It is important to speak.

On another note.. Christmas is almost upon us! Last night we had a little bit of a christmas party at our house - with a few friends over that we have made here (they are part of another program called Sword of the Spirit and we have been joining our groups occasionally because we all get along so well. They have 5 students or gappers in their group, but we have also been making friends with THEIR friends too. Its great.) We baked Christmas cookies and decorated them and had a huge community meal at our house and watched a movie, and ended with a dance party in our living room!! My favorite! Tonight there is another Christmas party that I may make an appearance at, and on Tuesday another one where we are having a gift exchange. On Christmas day I am going to help a church out with a meal they are serving to homeless people and families in need, and i think we decided to do a big Christmas brunch all together. I have plans over the holidays too to go to Giants Causeway (look it up) and a church formal or dance and possibly to a castle and a hike or two. And theres a chance I may go to 'Puffin Island' with Isaac.. Im not too sure how I feel about being on a bird island though... We are losing three of our family for the break - Jack Cortney and Carolyn are all going away, and Megan and Brian both have people coming. So Isaac me Steph and Nosipho will hold down the fort. It doesnt quite feel like christmas to me, but it is close. I did not expect to have a tree or any decorations - which we kind of do.. and I didnt really think I would experience any sort of the normal traditions that my family does, but again in some ways we have and will. I am looking forward to the intamacy with God I am sure this rest will give me. It will be nice to take time to just dwell in Him for a bit.

Other activities I have done so far have been... mmm there is a Christmas market here that has been up for a month or so and we went exploring that - they have food and goodies from all over the world. This is where I tried Kangeroo burgers. Ive also been to the coast now with Steph and Cortney and some of Stephs friends here. We went to watch Neil's rugby match (SO COOL!) and went to the coast and to an Irish pub after with the rugby team. Earlier this week I went and joined the Sword of the Spirit group and did some carolling. OH and last weekend we went exlporing the university grounds here which look like Hogwarts in Harry Potter. It is BEATIFUL. Weve also been in a lot of charity shops around the area. Mostly though our days are pretty simple. We are pretty contented to stay close to our house so far - partially because transportation is expensive and still unknown to us. And there is ALWAYS something to do at our house - conversation is never lacking when you are living with ten people and theres always journalling and laundry and letters to write. Mondays I am still grocery shopping, Tuesdays I am cooking, Wednesdays I have outreach at a youth centre, Thursdays I shop again (but its a smaller trip), Fridays we have community meal, and Saturday I usually come to the city to do emails or hang out, and Sunday is church of course. Those are things that are pretty consitant. Then all my other time is filler around that stuff. My outreach on Wed is at a place called the Hammer, and me and Cortney are supposed to be working with a group of girls there to get a fundraiser up and running with them to have a formal/dance for youth at the centre - we are setting up a tuck shop in the centre for treats throughout the night but so far no girls have shown to start this (even though it was their idea!) So we have been entertaing the boys for the past two weeks. The average age would be probably 15-17, and they basically just play football (soccer) and table tenis and pool. It was a little intimidating the first week, but I can see great potential with this outreach, and Im really looking forward to getting back to it after the break.

I tried to remember collectively all the questions Ive been getting, but ask again if I forgot anything. I miss you all, but I am so not ready to come home yet :) If anyone wants to call me I need to write down our phone number but you could get that from me and get a calling card. Just a thought...

Peace love and Joy

(and have a brilliant christmas)

like lightning

OK. I have like less than 5 minutes to get anything out that I want to before I am logged off so here we go..

It has been a whirlwind the past week and a half. We are renting a new house but couldnt move in on time so last minute plans were changed and we went down to another YWAM base in closkelt for a week to join them in their lectures. During the week something came up in our group and the staff actually had to make the heartbreaking decision to send one of out students home. God wanted him here for the time he was here, but he was needed to be back at home. So in less than 24 hours we were saying goodbye to one of our family members. It was really hard, especially on the boys since now there are only 3 of them. THEN on the last day in closkelt (friday) we got a new addition to our group. A girl from South Africa named Nosipho has joined us. AND we found out where out outreaches are going to be. I am going to INDIA! and so excited about that. All we know so far is how the groups are divided. Next week we will be finding out more about the details and the where and whats. When we got back to Belfast this past weekend we finally got the keys to our new house so we spent sat moving. It was (and is ) a loong process. The rearranging and cleaning still needs to be completed. BUT we also are starting our outreaches this week in the evenings and mornings (not every day... we are on a rota). Plus our first book report is due on monday soo needless to say it has been a stressful and hectic time here. This week in lectures we are learning about forgiveness - an interesting topic. hmm..

The good, no the great news in all of this is that through it all God is speaking to me more than i even know what to do with. He has given me an idea... its small.. but the spark is there now, and an idea is more than Ive had for my future than Ive had in a long time! I wont share now what that idea is.. just pray and know that it is a HUGE and drastically life changing idea. Also, I love to pray so keep sending me requests please.

and a big thank you and hug to you all that have and are sending me things in the mail. It is so exciting to get a little piece of home especially when communication is so limited I feel from my end. ( I literally dont have time to write letters right now even!). annnd even though it sounded like it, NO that was not a plug to get people to send me more.. Im very grateful for the letters and packages I have received. I cry and laugh when I get those things. So thanks!

FINALLY (I think the computer extended my time a little haha. this is good!) I just have to tell you all how excited I am that in our new house we have a prayer room.. all decked out with art supplies and paper covering the walls and pillows and such. It is such a cool thing. I loove spending time in there with our God. Even among all the stresses and changes right now it is amazing how much joy and peace I feel. When we were in Closkelt I climbed a "mountain" with Jack and we were able to stand in the very presence of God over looking the most majestic and glorious view Ive seen in a while. Gods breath was in the wind, and his gaze was in the setting sun. It was fantastic, and a memory sure to stay with me for the rest of my life.

My posts are getting more and more random! My time is up though.

Love.